November is filled with memories of Laura. I’ve hosted Thanksgiving at my house for decades, and since 2010, our core Thanksgiving crew has been the Baleses, the Palumbos, and us, with additional friends and family joining us across the years. Every October, Laura, Elizabeth, and I have the conversation that begins with, “We need to talk about Thanksgiving.” And talk we do, coming up with the menu and timing of all the things, which over the years has settled into a familiar pattern.
Each Thanksgiving brought new memories and additions (veggie turkey platter, anyone?) as well as the tried and true things that we all love, not to mention a variety of interesting stories involving frozen turkeys, blue plaid shirts (or was it green?), and turkey broth (aka the elixir of life). And because I’m the record-keeper, I can trace things back to the very beginning.
In 2012, things got even more interesting, because that was the year that Laura said, “I can bring spinach-artichoke dip,” and we foolishly (or perhaps presciently) said, “Yes, please! That sounds amazing. We can eat that while we’re waiting for the turkey.” Little did we know it, but that was the year that Dip Day was born, although it didn’t get its official name until several years later (it was called Artichoke Day for a couple of years). Because you see, like everything that Laura makes, that spinach-artichoke dip is the stuff that angels dream of, and we spent so much of our gastronomic resources consuming it that there was no room left in us for the turkey. I still remember the moment that Elizabeth and I turned to Laura and told her that she was banned forever from bringing that dip to future Thanksgivings, but that she absolutely had to make it again the next year, and we would come to her house the day after Thanksgiving and eat it.
So, beginning in 2013, the Friday after Thanksgiving was spent at the Palumbos’ eating an assortment of dips, with Laura’s spinach-artichoke dip holding pride of place in the middle of the table. Over the years, Dip Day garnered a loyal following of several families, inspired its own logo and t-shirts, and has become a legendary event among our friend group, with its very own spin-offs.
At its core, Dip Day is about the deep connections among friends that require us to spend as much time together as humanly possible, while celebrating those ridiculous moments that make us laugh and creating our own rituals to further connect us together along the way. The fourth Thursday in November is a time when I find myself reflecting on so much historical and continuing pain and grief. As I do so, I feel the need to gather my loved ones close, to shore up my soul with love in order to process all of those big emotions. This past year especially, knowing that Laura was unable to be with us in person, I found myself more grateful than ever for my chosen family, those people that have shown me time and again how much I am loved and valued, and for whom I have done the same. These are the people that ground us and allow us to walk through this world with equanimity. Our Thanksgiving and Dip Day traditions are ones that soothe our hurts and nurture our souls, and Laura will forever be a part of these for us all.
Our Typical Thanksgiving Menu:
Turkey (hopefully not frozen – Laurel)
Cornbread-Mushroom Stuffing (Laurel)
Grandmama’s Sweet Potato Casserole (Laurel)
Mashed Potatoes (Elly)
Turkey Gravy (Elly)
Rolls (Elly)
Green Beans w/Slivered Almonds (Laura)
Veggie Platter in Shape of Turkey (Laura)
Usually some kind of Extra Side Dish, which varied (Laura)
Lemonade or Apple Cider (Laura)
So. Much. Wine. (varied)
Apple Pie (Elly)
Pecan Pie (Elly)
Pumpkin Pie (when we got lucky – Elly)
Ice Cream (Laurel)
Marie Callender’s Chocolate Pie (Laura)
Whipped Cream (Laurel)
A Typical Dip Day Menu:
Spinach-Artichoke Dip (Laura)
Lasagne Dip (Elly)
Cinnamon Cream Cheese Dip (Laurel)
Meatballs (Laura)
Seven-Layer Dip (sometimes)
A whole lot of other stuff brought typically by the Connors, the Wursts, and others